rockin' the burbs y'all

So, its a Saturday night, in the middle of easter no less, and there's nothing better to than to rock on down to the mighty Westpac Stadium (or The Caketin or The Ring of Fire depending on how you like your balls) for the first night of Rock 2 Wellington, the rock festival where large numbers of bogans come out to play. It was a pretty kickass line up too, Lordi, Alice Cooper, and the worlds greatest Kiss tribute band, KISS!!!!!!!!

After a few pre-gig drinks with mates, we rocked on up, our tickets taking us into the mosh pit area right up the front. Now, thanks to taking our time with the pre-gig drinks, there was little waiting around for the opening act. Or should I say acts. Placed around the stadium where you usually sit for the sporting events were 6 guitar gods, all taking their turn to slay the amassed crowd into submission with their guitaring prowess. Yep, it was a boring as it sounds, tho' the last 2 spiced things up a bit with a feedback solo from the 1st, and guitar smash-age from the 2nd.

Once the would-be guitar gods were out of the way, it was time for our 1st band, Lordi, all the way from somewhere in Scandinavia. Now, being that these guys were a) Scandinavian, b) in costume, and c) former Eurovision song contest winners, I was pretty much expecting to hate Lordi. But, they were brilliant. They didn't take themselves too seriously, the songs, while not making wanna buy an album any time soon, were pretty cool. There were explosions on stage, and theatrics. They were just fun.

Next up were locals Sonic Alter. Now, given that a) they were local support at a "Rock" gig and b) they were playing, not on the main stage, but a tiny stage up in the grandstand to the side of the main stage, I was pretty much expecting to hate Sonic Alter. But, again, I was mistaken, these guys were pretty cool too, nothing special, but pretty servicable chuggy rock. Also, while they were playing, the crowd were entertained by a dragon shooting lasers (thanks weta), demonic looking chairleaders, and firedancers.

Next up on the main stage was Alice Cooper. Now here is a guy who has been plying his trade for nearly 40 years. Now when you consider that, you'ld think that he'd maybe tone down his show a little, given that he's getting on a bit. You could, but that would condescending as all hell. The guy was fucking incredible, he had everthing, the great songs, a kickass backing band, great stage show, awesome!!!!! I knew it was going to be a great set when 3 songs in, Alice launches into Under My Wheels, one of my favourite Cooper tunes, and one I wasn't really expecting to hear, expecially 3rd song in the set, and more especially with the reaction it got from the crowd. They (we) were so into it, every tune greeted like an old pal. All the classics, No More Mister Nice Guy, Welcome To My Nightmare, Schools Out, plus an encore featuring Poison and Elected!!! Fantastic. Plus, there were what I guess you might call dancers, acting out some of the more theatrical tunes, which are Coopers trademark. There was Alice killing a baby, escpaing a straightjacket, and late in the set, being hung from the gallows. And, best thing, the crowd bought the whole lot, Alice had us in the palm of his hand fron the moment he walked on stage. Fantastic!!!

After Alice had finished slaying us, it was time for more fire dancers, more demonic chairleaders, more laser shooting dragon action, and more local support act action. I didn't catch the name of the 2nd kiwi band, but it didn't matter cos they were rubbish. No groove at all, I would actually be shocked if they had actually met before the gig, let alone played together. I mean oragnisers, really. Were 5 Star Fallout busy? And how bad must it have been for the band to not only have the power go out and put them out of our missery, but during their set, you could hear the stage crew sound checking Gene Simmons bass. Loudly. Like drowning out the support band loud! Oh, how I laughed.

Now it was time for the main event. The stage was set, the banner at the front of the stage was falling down even before the stage anouncer greeted us with the most famous words in rock.....You wanted the best, you got the best, KISS!!!!!!!!!!!(or something to that effect) There a big boom coutesy of the fireworks, the big banner eventually came down after its ealier reluctance to stay up, a Kiss launched into Duece. There they were, Kiss. First song was brilliant, but as the banner shenanigans proved, it wasn't really gonna be their night. Paul Stanley tried all his stage banter to get the crowd going, but either the crowd were not into it, or only a handful of us had heard Kiss Alive. It wasn't like Kiss were playing poorly, far from it, they have a reputation for being a kickass live band, and as far as I was concerned, they lived up that reputation. Its just that the crowd reaction was flat, and crowd participation part of the Kiss magic, you know the whole call and response bit, the crowd hanging on Paul Stanleys every word, that kinda stuff. Yeah, things just kinda fell a bit flat. Then, Gene comes forward to do the blood spitting thing. The build up was incredible, you started to get the impression that the crowd might finally get the whole thing and cut loose, then, blugh, blood everywhere, really cool, then via the harness in his back, Gene was about to fly to the top of the stage!!!!!! Or, to about a foot and a half above the stage. Yep, it didn't work how it was meant to. Bummer. At least it worked when the attached cable to Eric Singers drum riser and lifted him to the top of the stage during the set. I should mention the pyrotechnic action. During all the climactic moments, there would be fire erupting from the stage, or some sorta fireworks going off. Very cool. Kiss do put on a very tight show, everything is timed to perfection, and despite the lack of crowd enthusiasm (they seemed to enjoy the set, just not by Kiss standards I think) and Gene's harness mishap, things were going great. (Oh, did I mention that the stadium was far from full? Don't think Rock 2 Wellington will be happening next year somehow). Next trick was Paul saying I wanted to see the folks at the back, which was funny cos the "back" of the mosh pit was about 3/4 the way from the front of the area allocated for the moshpit area, and thats me being an optimist. Undeterred by this, Paul jumps on a flying fox contraption and "flys" to the back and plays a song from a little stage on top of the sound desk, then flew back again. The less said about the acoustic version of Shandi the better (I just don't like that tune). The set finished with a great version of Rock and Roll Allnite, we got covered in mini tissues, there were more explosions, etc, and Kiss left the stage to count their money.

Now, I don't wanna give the impression I hated Kiss's set. Far from it, I had the best time. But it was just a bit flat, the crowd weren't as into it as Kiss would have liked (and it showed too). The other comedy moment was Paul leaving a line hanging for the crowd to sing, and about 3 people self conciously doing so. Pauls next words were "I heard absolutely no one!" and he seemed absolutely shocked. Great gig, flat crowd, Alice Cooper was the winner on the day, but not by much.